On my first day at work this week my tuktuk, which I take to the main school, got a puncture so my tuktuk driver told me to get off and left me on the side of the road saying “I come back 2 mins.” 30mins later…………………. and he arrives on the motorbike, tuktukless. I hitch my skirt up to an inappropriate height and jump on the back of the motorbike and hold on for dear life.
This week I’ve been working at a school that is 20km away from Siem Reap. In other words the arse end of nowhere! The only way to get to this village is by motorbike along a dirt road, which turns to mud and then a river during a monsoon, and is full of crater size potholes.
While in the wall less classroom the monsoon rain hits, so we decided to end the class early as there was no sign of it easing off and we wanted the kids to get home safely.
Of all the days to forget my coat (it’s more of a plastic sheet) I had to borrow one from the teacher to get home. As I pulled it on, it ripped, right up the side, from my knee to my armpit. With no other option we head back to Siem Reap in the monsoon rain dodging potholes full of rainwater along the way.
I couldn’t do anything but hold on and knew that I had no other choice but to continue to drive through the rain so I began to laugh. I pretty much laughed all the way back. Someone gave me a bit of advice about Cambodia which was, laugh at the things you can’t change. I saw no better time than the present to adopt this attitude. Arriving back in Siem Reap an hour and a half later I was soaking wet from head to toe.
The next day the ride home could not have been any more different. In pitch black, as there is no electricity in the village, all I could hear was the sound of the frogs, smell the open fires for cooking and see stars in all directions. I thought “Yep. This is what I signed up for.”
Work here still manages to be a struggle. The teaching side is very rewarding but the organisational side is a long slow process. I think the word of the moment is roadblock. I’ve learnt to focus on my small achievements like:
1. Catching my tuktuk driver, who spoke no English 10 weeks ago reading an English/Khmer dictionary
2. Providing a tuktuk driver with a stable income
3. Having the kids run up to me when I arrive at work screaming “Leah. Leah” (note: I do expect this when I get back home!!)
4. My laundry woman is practicing her English and is making huge steps forward
5. I’ve been able to show some of the kids some affection they would never have had otherwise
Business etiquette here is so different to anything I’ve ever experienced. I find it really hard that no one questions anything. They are so status focused. From the instant they meet you they want to know who you are, what your age is and what you do for a job. I know we have this at home where we asks where people went to university but it’s a whole other level. I love that they have respect for their elders but this in a work environment can be taken too far. It means that if people are not happy, satisfied or are doing the right thing they are not questioned and everything is just accepted as “that’s the way it is.” It doesn’t seem like people are accountable for their actions and decisions. I’m finding that very hard as I was taught to be respectful to everyone, especially elders but to always be independent and question if something did not make sense or seem right. Some things here I have to accept I will not understand, like or change. What is the point if it is a cultural thing that will not change?
They also never say no and do not make eye contact. If they do not agree with something you say they agree with you then go off and do what they were going to do anyway. This has left me in a very confused state on so many occasions. Is it lying or just cultural? I know how I would have viewed it on week 3 but I’m on week 10 now. I’m not sure how anything gets done at all. How do they disagree with a fellow Cambodian or does it all come down to status?
I’m trying to pick my battles.
People are incredibly respectful of you being a foreigner and giving up your time to come and help but I’m coming up against a roadblock I’ve never come across before………. being a woman.
I never even considered this being an issue. Was I naive or do I just see it as a nonissue? You see it all over the place in London but I suppose women in the west have a bit more of a voice and are not considered stupid. It’s not perfect but there is generally a lot less tolerance for sex discrimination.
I just think there are enough issues that we have to face. Why add something so stupid to the mix?
What I find funny is that it’s like any country, if you hang around long enough you can see that it is the women who are really running the show. It just looks like the men are cos they are more at the forefront and are the loudest. You have to think, why do they have the saying “behind every great man there has to be a great woman.”
I’m very judgemental and make snap decisions about whether I like people or not, usually within seconds, but that’s never due to their gender, class or status in society. I was raised to treat the rubbish man the same way as my teacher or the doctor……..with respect. The only reason I’d treat someone differently is if you’re a downright twat.
I was teaching in a classroom last week that was by the roadside. As I was teaching a man in his 40s sat down in the class, as the parents often do, and I thought nothing of it. A few minutes later he interrupted the class and started speaking to the teacher in Khmer. My Khmer isn’t fantastic but I knew from their body language and what I could understand that he was asking about me. I asked the teacher to translate and he explained that the man was a local rubbish collector who saw a white woman teaching a classroom full of Cambodian children and wanted to know what I was doing, so he came over. He asked if he could shake my hand and thanked me for helping the children and his country. I was a little blown away and just smiled. He left me alone for about 2mins, said something in Khmer and the kids started roaring with laughter “Lady. Can I please shake your hand again?”
Quite frankly, in 2 and a half months, I’ve seen enough willy to last me a lifetime.
There are kids everywhere as the Cambodians are going through a baby boom. Most children, funnily boys and not girls, under the age of 5 walk around with no underwear on and just pee wherever they feel like it. I’ve figured out that it’s too hot for nappies, they are probably too expensive and why use a sewage system that’s not overly reliable, but I’ve still not figured out why it’s usually the boys and not the girls.
That said it’s not just the childrens willies I’m talking about. The men wear the equivalent of a scarf wrapped around their waist, which more often than not, only covers the necessities.
I was taken along to a meeting the other day with the Village Chief. He didn’t know I was going to be there and was clearly not prepared for me. When we arrived he walked out in a tiny Khmer Rouge scarf (I still haven’t figured out if this is in support or if it’s the only thing they have. More than likely in support given the remote areas I’m working in) that was wrapped around his waist. This barely covered the necessities and I had to avert my eyes as he sat down with his hand over his jewels. Thank god it was dusk. Had it been earlier in the day he may have shared even more! I couldn’t imagine entering into or sending my guys into a business meeting in London dressed like this. Would it increase or decrease business?
The families who live next to the schools, like the rest of the villagers, wash in the well water right outside the classroom. The adults remain covered but the kids stand there starkers while I’m trying to teach. I can’t help but laugh at the contrast to my working life in London sometimes.
If any of you have seen me dance at home you’ll know that I dance with my bum, have no shame and it’s not usually suitable for unaccompanied minors. I went to a leaving party for a friend the other day and one of the local Councillors and his wife were invited. He was a rather large, jovial man that spoke very little English. I’m off dancing, as I do, and the next thing the Councillor is insisting on dancing with me and says in his broken English “Wife. No problem.” Not entirely sure in what way he meant this I just carried on and thought I’d just see what happened. He insisted on trying to dance like me so, here I am on the dance floor, with this guy, teaching him the Leah booty shake. By the reaction I got I think I made a lasting impression.
I’ve had some funny conversations while I’ve been here:
“Leah. Pretty girls. Pretty girls” – my tuktuk driver who couldn’t speak English 9 weeks ago taught himself this and insists on stopping every time he sees one.
“Fat. Fat.” Pointing at the t-shirt I have on with a picture of Ganesh on it.
“What? Me or Ganesh?”
“You fat like him. I want to be fat like you.”
Leah – Apparently my name means Donkey and Goodbye. It can become very confusing sometimes.
Good – means bum in Khmer. No wonder the kids laugh at me whenever I say it.
“My favourite person is Polpot.” – in an essay written by an 18 year old teacher who was writing about his favourite things.
“No Leah. Prostitution isn’t a Cambodian problem. It doesn’t happen here. It’s a Western problem.”
New photo albums this week…………..
Carry Cambodia
Easily the best thing about Cambodia
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