Week two almost complete and I can safely say I never knew you could feel and see so much happiness, sadness, joy and misery all at the same time. This week has been really hard emotionally. I’ve felt really vulnerable. I’ve had my first, second, third and forth lot of tears, often at the oddest times as well. I’ve had days where I love Cambodia and my job and days where I’ve had ‘WTF it’s not worth it’ moments. This week I’ve lived off arnica, rescue remedy and the medical kit my aunty Judith sent me before I left (massive thanks Judith).
As usual though, I’ve found that a wee bit (sometimes a hell of a lot) of good old kiwi banter seems to get me through most situations. Laughter really is the best medicine for keeping yourself sane.
I knew life here would be different, challenging and sometimes just downright shit but knew that the good would go with the bad and there was no use in over analysing, preparing for how it would be or how I could react to certain situations before I came. Everyone asked me if I was excited before I left and really, I wasn’t all that much. I’m not even sure I’ve been overly excited since I’ve been here. Don’t get me wrong, I have this amazing opportunity that I will forever remember but I’m not here as a tourist. I can safely say that I am seeing a different Cambodia to what the tourists see. I don’t get to see and do all the fun stuff all the time. I get the everyday life. The highs, the lows and every other thing in between. Sometimes all within the space of 10mins.
Working in a community with people that are ex Khmer Rouge is strange. Knowing that people I come into contact with everyday could have potentially been murderers but watching them be gentle grandmothers and grandfathers with their children is well, strange. Given that the Cambodian Prime Minister is ex Khmer Rouge does not surprise me. There seems to be acceptance one day of their past and mass denial the next. One day Pol Pot is God and the next the Devil. I haven’t yet decided if I think this is cos they actually believe this and their views change or if the sudden denial is out of fear. There seems to be a lot of ‘looking behind their shoulder’ when talking about the past. Modern history is not being taught at school here as no one can decide what happened. Some say the Vietnamese are to blame for everything, some say Pol Pot and some deny anything happened at all, despite the fact someone is making money out of the killing fields and many museums around the country. It’s frustrating, but mainly sad that I know more about their history than most of the people I meet on a daily basis.
There seems to be this wasted generation here. Men and women in their 30s and 40s are generally shit parents. Fair enough given that they would have either lost their parents or their parental authority was taken away. They didn’t have any role models but you seem to see the very old grandparents raising all the children instead of the parents. The women are very strong, amazing workers and I’m pretty sure, run this country but what they expect and accept of their husbands is a whole other world to me. The men…….well……….lazy, cheating, drunks. I’m not male bashing. There is a whorehouse right outside my place. I can see it with my own eyes. I’m pretty sure the money in the family is spent in the following order:
- Alcohol
- Hookers
- Food for the family
I don’t really find the poverty all the concerning. What it makes people do, on both sides – that’s the concerning part. It’s when a figure is put on a human life that you can see how desperate people really are. US$70 for a child, US$10 for a shag – child or adult. You choose.
Some days, all I can say is, this is a bizarre place.
Cambodia seems to want to develop and can see the advantages but as most post war countries go, $$$ seems to talk, way before human rights are taken into account.
There are “safe “ centres for children all over the place. Child abuse and trafficking is obviously a very important issue to the Cambodian community and full credit to them cos they are working very hard to protect the children and show the children and their families a life outside of the sex industry. It’s a shame that the government doesn’t seem to support that view in practice. Cambodia is one of the easiest countries I’ve ever gotten into. There are no criminal checks or declarations at all so they can, and seem to, let in everyone. There are some shifty buggers around the place!! Front page news the other days was about a guy that had abused 17 different children in Cambodia and his sentence was being reduced by 6mths and then he would then not be deported but let back out in the community here.
I’m pretty sure I could make a bucket load off a bumper sticker that says
“ Asia – where every white man feels like a stud”
I couldn’t help but notice that there were so many Koreans in Siem Reap. Not just tourists but shop owners, restaurant owners etc. Siem Reap is a nice city, by 3rd world standards, but I just couldn’t understand what the draw was for them so I started asking a lot of questions. Cambodia has relaxed the visa requirements for Koreans to come here and set up businesses and buy land. There is quite a bit of resentment towards the Koreans and the land grabbing that’s going on. There is this huge Korean building that I drive past everyday to get to work. I started asking questions about it as it’s not in keeping with the environment it’s been built in and was informed that a community of approx. 800 families were forced to sell their land at a stupid figure to allow the Koreans to build there. Like most things in Cambodia, there is often no appeal process. I’m not anti development at all. I wouldn’t do my job if I was. But if Cambodia wants to play with the big boys then development is their way forward and will bring in the big bucks. But there seems to be, as usual, little forward planning of what this place will be like in 20 years time, who theses decision impact upon short and long term, remembering what human rights are and apart from money, what is the country and the wider community going to gain from this development.
I can’t help but wonder, with the second Khmer Rouge (case 002) trial taking place at the moment, if they will be able to allow justice to be done, if anyone’s human rights will be taken into account and if corruption can take a back seat for a while.
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